I feel blessed to meet twins I helped create, says egg donor

Family ties: egg donor Sylvia Barr with, from left, her own son Elliot, twins Katherine and Jonathan and Joan Isherwood
12 April 2012

A woman who donated her eggs has become one of the first in Britain to meet the children she helped conceive.

Sylvia Barr, now 54, gave away her eggs anonymously nearly 20 years ago at a London clinic.

But Ms Barr read a newspaper article after she donated which told the story of how Joan Isherwood, who is from Cheshire, had successfully become pregnant using an egg donor.

The clinic, the dates and the fact that they were twins - Jonathan and Katherine, now 18 - coincided with Ms Barr's story and she felt sure that Mrs Isherwood was her recipient.

Today, Ms Barr, from Wallington, in south London, spoke of feeling "blessed" at finally meeting her son and daughter after years of hoping they would track her down.

In an interview with the Standard, Ms Barr said: "I feel so blessed to have met them - it was a surreal moment.

"Just being in the same room with them and being able to touch them was indescribable.

"For years I'd fantasised about this but I thought if I tried to contact them they might reject me. Of course the opposite was true - it has been monumental and I could never have hoped for this to happen."

Ms Barr decided to "give something back" by donating her eggs after conceiving her son Elliott, 19, with the help of a sperm donor.

He was conceived through an assisted conception clinic at King's College Hospital in London.

Her eggs were then donated via the London Fertility Centre in Harley Street to Mrs Isherwood, now 65, who had lost her sons David, four, and Andrew, nine, in a car accident when they were on holiday in Crete.

The accident also left Mrs Isherwood severely injured and unable to have any more children.

Desperate to have a family, she underwent IVF at the London Fertility Centre using Ms Barr's donated eggs.

The clinic did tell Ms Barr the attempt had been successful but she never expected to know any more. Under UK laws, donors are barred from finding out the identities of their children although they can register their details in case they wish to get in touch.

After reading the article Ms Barr did not want to upset the family and waited until the twins were 18 before contacting them in February this year with the help of UK Donor Link.

She said: "I didn't want to do anything to upset them and wasn't confident they'd want to meet me. So I wrote three letters - one to Joan and her husband then to both of the children. It was Jonathan who emailed me straight back and said he'd be happy to meet me."

Now Ms Barr is hoping that Elliott will be able to meet his sperm donor.

BBC1, 10.35pm, Donor Mum: The Children I've Never Met.

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