From bugaboos to bonfires - the mad march miscellany
There were crazy outfits everywhere at Saturday's demo, but it was the British sense of humour that shone through
Humour
There's one thing the Coalition can't cut - the British sense of humour. Arguably, the TUC set the tone by organising the protest in such an auspicious month (March!). The cheery protesters responded in kind, from the acrostic "Warmongering aristocrats needlessly killing economic recovery" to the brutal "There are two things I hate about Nick Clegg: Clegg; his face" and the whimsical "It's my birthday - if you are going to kettle me there had better be cake involved". The best of the lot was held by a woman in a wheelchair: "If you want my benefits, you can have
my disability."
Children
With the Bugaboos out in force, it was as if the marchers had discovered a new secret weapon in the war on cuts: cuteness. A six-year-old girl dressed as Tinkerbell took the prize. Her placard told the world: "Fairies don't like cuts." An honourable mention goes to the kid in the star-spangled romper suit, perched on her dad's shoulders, holding the banner: "I was told there would be biscuits".
Headwear
Animal-inspired designs were out in force - panda hats and lion heads were popular. Anarchists
favoured V For Vendetta masks or simple black bandanas.
Firestarters
At around midday someone painted "26/03 BURN THIS CITY!" on Waterloo Bridge. It proved prophetic - the anarchists started fires all over the place. It all began getting a bit Wicker Man at around 5pm, when a vast wooden horse was set ablaze in the centre of the pedestrian crossing at Oxford Circus. "Someone call the fire brigade - oh wait, we've cut them!" exclaimed one wag.
Music
The main march resounded to the RMT steel band, the terrific Bollywood Brass Band playing Crazy by Gnarls Barkley and an indefatigable samba troupe. The anarchists - so 1997 - appeared to favour drum and bass. At Hyde Park Corner at 8pm, a group of shirtless yobs led a drum and bass rave around another acrid fire, fuelled by plastic placards (a bonfire of the inanities?) "NO ONE'S GONNA F**KING TELL US WHAT TO DO!" called a strung-out man into a megaphone. "C'mon man, this is London, someone's got to have some ketamine," one man complained.
