Laura Craik on emoji woes, Cara and Margot’s twinsies, and those Calvin Klein adverts

Our columnist takes on the latest trends
Laura Craik11 August 2016

It’s International Emoji Week. Okay, it isn’t. But it should be. This time last year, my inbox was stuffed with Steal Her Style emails. Now, it’s clogged up with new emoji launches. I realise August is Silly Season, but truly, I need a Lydia Bright emoji, a Bieber emoji and series of Frozen emojis from a film even my kids got bored of last Christmas like I need a hole in the head* — and no, that’s not a subtle cue for some loser to release a string of Prince emojis, before anyone gets any ideas.

Lest the thousands of Unicode/TOWIE/Disney/Apple/Kimoji variants aren’t sufficiently charged with nuance, Londoners can now download their own set of emoji stickers, too. If you fancy sending someone a shisha pipe, a craft beer, a naked Boris Johnson or a bearded hipster with heart eyes, Londonmoji has it covered, and yes, only one of these is made up.

My relationship with emojis is best described as ;-/ (it is still not possible to drop an actual emoji into a printed column. I KNOW). In the beginning, it was pleasingly uncomplicated: you loved a pic, you posted a red heart emoji, or maybe the pink one with the yellow bow. But then emojis went PC. It’s right that they did, of course, but being presented with six skin tone options is a minefield. I’m white. Do all my face emojis have to be peach? Does the default yellow one convey technical ineptitude, or anti-Chinese sentiment? How I long for the simple joy my kids derive from their beloved poo emoji, now immortalised in the bedroom as a cushion. What with Apple replacing its gun emoji with a water pistol, it seems to me that something invented as a time-saving visual shorthand has now morphed into a method of communication way more fraught than words. Nonetheless, this week’s gift from me to you is emojitracker.com (unless you’re epileptic, in which case, avoid). Enjoy.

*Fairly obscure Prince song reference.

Track mates

Matching tracksuits: so very hen night, but also so very Cara Delevingne. Designed by Chaos, aka Fendi/Anya Hindmarch brand consultants Charlotte Stockdale and Katie Lyall, they’re embroidered with ‘SKWAD’ on the back. My only quibble about Cara and Margot Robbie’s hers ‘n’ hers navy satin tracksuits (above right) is that they didn’t wear them to the premiere of their new film, Suicide Squad, and only reserved them for the after-party. You can never have too many tracksuits on the red carpet, especially ones as outré as these. Expect personalised acetate tracksuits to be this Christmas’s animal onesies. You’ve been warned.

Rex

Secret's out

In fashion’s never-ending game of musical chairs, not every designer bum ends up perched on a perfect throne. But if Justin O’Shea was a clever/risky wildcard at Brioni, and if Anthony Vaccarello has big boots to fill at Saint Laurent, there are fewer qualms about Raf Simons’ appointment at Calvin Klein. As chief creative officer, Simons (below) will have control over everything: not just the runway, but all 25 product categories, including — crucially — the ad campaigns. Since I can’t see Raf approving a tagline that says ‘I Belfie In My Calvins’, I’m hoping it means an end to CK’s drearily sexual undie ads, as well as a combination of its mega-lovely clothes. I’m sure Raf would agree that the world doesn’t need any more up-crotch shots.

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