Lord Monson: the upper classes are cruel — cruel, archaic and ruthless

Since the death of his only son last year, Lord Monson has fought for his daughter Isabella’s right to inherit the family title. Here he explains why
Tragic death: Lord Monson’s son Alexander, who died in police custody in Kenya, and daughter Isabella
Collect pic from sister Isabella
Charlotte Edwardes12 September 2014

Nicholas, the 12th Baron Monson, is not surprised to hear that the Earl of Durham has issued a High Court writ to prevent his three sisters making any claim on his inheritance.

Lady Lucinda Lambton, Lady Beatrix Neville and Lady Anne Lambton received nothing in their father’s will, despite the fact that a chunk of the family’s wealth is in Italy, where the law states all children have a right to an equal share. “The upper classes are cruel,” says Lord Monson. “Cruel and ruthless.”

Lord Monson, 58, is the latest recruit to a campaign calling on the Government to end the “outdated and manifestly unfair” laws of succession. The campaign for Equality for Women in the Peerage is spearheaded by Lady Liza Campbell (who Monson calls “our Boadicea”), the Countess of Clancarty, the Hon Sarah Long, and the Earl and Countess of Balfour. They’ve been nicknamed “The Hares” after Lord Trefgarne told the House of Lords the Royal Succession Bill had “set running the hare of what happens to the hereditary peerage”.

Their supporters include Viscountess Linley, Lord Beaverbrook and Amanda Murray, the eldest of Lord Braybrooke’s eight daughters (the Braybrooke title and family estate is set to go to a fourth cousin once removed).

At first glance Monson, 58, an investor relations consultant, is an unlikely activist, not least because his own title has been passed down the male line since 1611. He comes barrelling to the front door of his Knightsbridge flat and greets me with a circulation-cutting handshake. In some respects he fits the cliché of the Eton-educated peer: bags of charm, a hint of a stammer and social networking friends that include dogs with their own Facebook pages.

Monson (“pronounced Munson, like Monday, money and monkey”) has the sort of thundering voice that could carry across fields of both estate and battle and a hooting laugh. But beneath the jovial façade there is an underlying sadness: his son Alexander, 28, died tragically almost exactly a year ago.

“I’m good at putting on a brave face,” he says. “And I suppose I play the colourful character sometimes.” He has a serious side and his reformist zeal is part of that. “I’ve long had a sense that primogeniture was unfair,” he says. “As a child I came up with this rather novel resolution: that everyone should have a title — everyone!”

The death of his son threw this issue into stark relief. As the law stands, his daughter Isabella, 26, will be passed over. The title will slide sideways to his brother, Andrew, who also has daughters.

"Once my generation dies, our two titles, as the law currently stands, die too." he says. "600 years of family history - starting with John Monson, Quartermaster at the Battle of Agincourt - kaput. How sad. That is why the law of titled succession should now embrace the spirit of the times and accept female equality. How wonderful - for me at least - if the Monson titles continue through Isabella."

Does Isabella have a view? “Her attitude is that if it comes to her, it comes to her,” he says, adding that she’s been through a lot. “But other sisters and daughters are right to have a sense of indignation. Often they will get nothing, or next to nothing. It’s archaic.”

He acknowledges that the idea of equality in a system that is all about privilege is itself flawed. “People say, ‘These titled nobility, it’s all anachronistic, it’s all unfair’ and I say, ‘Well yes’. But then again, if you are going to swear allegiance to the crown, you can’t very well dump the nobility. They are inextricably linked.”

In common with most peers, Monson read closely the news that the Queen wanted Prince William’s first-born to be the heir to the throne regardless of gender. “When I read that, I thought: ‘Well that’s a game-changer’. You can’t have one rule for royalty and another for the nobility. If the royal family do it, how can it not be the same for everyone?”

The flat is freezing and I am reminded that the upper classes don’t feel the cold, growing up in those big draughty houses. Noticing, he turns on a fan heater, pointing it at my legs. “There you are,” he says. His third wife, Silviana, 42 — whom he describes as a “quiet, sober, and calming influence” — checks he is okay.

Does he feel the nobility is more likely to survive if it reforms? “The more in step with the modern world, the more the modern world will accommodate them,” he says. “Look at history: the French aristocracy behaved outrageously. They brought it on themselves. They became so stuck up their derrières.”

Like his fellow campaigners, he has met strong opposition. “Oh yes, there are loads of them against me,” he says. “They don’t want it tinkered with. They’ve got it all neatly sorted with trusts.” Indeed, some aristocrats would rather the title died out than passed to a daughter.

“The Marquis of Lothian is completely against it — and he’s got daughters,” says Monson. “The title will be moving down to a nephew and all the trusts have been set up.”

He sits back in his chair to adopt a conciliatory tone: “It’s not black and white,” he says, “I respect some of the arguments from peers who are against us: it’s too much, it’s too difficult, it’s messy. I appreciate that. It’s not straightforward.” Then he leans forward again: “But a principle is a principle. Whenever there’s a big change, there is always collateral damage.”

Monson’s own father, the 11th Baron, sold the family estate — North Carlton Hall in Lincolnshire — along with 1,000 acres in 1963. The family moved to a manor house where Nicholas’s mother currently lives. He has no idea how this will be divided up between the siblings. “It’s up to my mother,” he says.

How does the rest of his family feel about the title passing to a woman? Monson considers this. “Well, let’s say I sent out an email and only one member of the family replied.” It was his aunt Sandra — “a beautiful and splendid woman” — who suggested it might even pass back to her.

What about his brother Andrew? He shakes his head cautiously. They haven’t spoken. “I accept that there’s an argument that the title should go to my brother should I pre-decease him,” he says. “I don’t want to have any feeling of ‘Yah-boo, sucks, you’re not getting it, Isabella is’. I understand and appreciate his feelings of deprivation. It’s not easy. However, to make omelettes you have to break eggs.”

We return to the subject of his son, Alexander. Monson is still very much in mourning. His son died a year ago last Sunday at the hands of the Kenyan police. He received a fatal blow to the head after being arrested on suspicion of smoking cannabis — although toxicology reports showed no drugs in his blood. Monson’s ex-wife Hilary, 59, Alexander’s mother, marked the day in Kenya with a procession that dropped 365 roses on a route from the police station and the hospital where he died to his favourite place on the coast.

Lord Monson uses a brutal simile to describe how it felt to lose his son. “It’s like when someone is attacked by a wild animal and they survive, but with atrocious injuries. During the attack, when the body is buffered, torn and ripped they don’t feel a thing because of the adrenaline. Afterwards ... Well.”

He adds: “I put on a brave face, but this has affected me for life. It would serve as a healing process if Isabella took the title. That is part of it. Yes.”

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